Today was a much better day than I’ve experienced in weeks. I was almost, happy you could say. I went out and bought my goldfish a plant to celebrate their rejuvenation. I considered getting a tattoo of the Aquarius symbol, which then morphed into an upside down pot being the trunk of a tree, with water spilling out for its roots and a large canopy above it, perhaps with my initial hidden amongst the leaves. I’m not big on tattoos though, so we’ll see how long this idea goes on for. It’s certainly a new fun thing to think about, at any rate.
Math was better today. There were a few moments where either the teacher said something funny, or the person next to me did, which helped tremendously to pass the time. I’m not big on talking to people, especially when there’s no opportunity for it, so having someone else make funny remarks is lovely. That and (as backwards as this is for me) I don’t like offending strangers, so making jokes around people I don’t know is not something I’m likely to do at all. I’m meanest to my friends, lol. Pretty much once I no you my filter comes off and I’m bound to say anything and everything, so that you’re as likely to hear my genuine opinion at any given moment as not. Yesterday I told a girl I’ve been friends with since sophomore year in high school that I only became her friend after pretending to be her friend to copy homework. Everyone involved in the situation KNEW that’s what was happening at the time, including her, but I’m the type of person who will actually bring it up. Sometimes even I find it a little abrasive, but I’m constantly told by various people that it’s their favorite quality in me.
Anyway. I’m not looking forward to going to sleep. Already I can feel today’s… whatever this was; perhaps normal is the right word. I don’t know that I was particularly happy, but there wasn’t that usual weight on my chest that makes everything harder, even breathing. Anyhow, I can feel todays normality wearing off and I’m not inclined to go to sleep, for fear of waking up depressed again. It’s been nice being normal for today. Though, I did nothing different from my usual routine. I did dust, which hasn’t been done in weeks, but I don’t think that alone would be enough to kick someone out of being depressed. My house is a mess though. There are major fires in eastern Washington right now and the smoke has slowly made its way over here. You can actually smell it when you’re outside. They’ve been showing pictures and clips on the news that show the smoke thicker than most fogs we get. We had a day or two of rain a week ago, but it didn’t make it over the mountains. Our air is dirty and my house dirtier. The dust on everything is dreadful. I used one of my ‘fancy’ dust rags to clean the living room today and completely changed its color. And I only did the living room.
Maybe tomorrow I’ll move the furniture around. It’s a shame our living room is so small. Or rather, it’s a shame we have such large furniture. My room is the largest room in the house, but it’s stuffed full of bookshelves and dressers and tables. If I didn’t have a test tomorrow, I think I’d move things around now actually. That said, today has become tomorrow and I should really go to sleep. I was going to wake up early and run down to the pet store to get a second plant and maybe a play thing for my fish or something. I was debating getting a chameleon, but they sound like too much work. I dunno. Something has to be done tomorrow though. My furniture is going to be moved for certain. I’m tired of this current arrangement.