I’ve been seriously considering dropping out of school entirely for days now. I’m so not motivated it’s not even funny. I don’t see the point to 90% of my school work, and even if I do I don’t understand how to do it. I feel like just dropping out and getting a full time job would be loads easier. And it would take a lot of the stress of the bills off of my mom. I see that I need to be doing things, but don’t do them until (literally) the last possible minute. I’ve got a four page essay due tomorrow, which I have no clue how to write, that I haven’t even started yet. We’ve had a week to do it. I feel like doing anything drains me of what little energy I have. I managed to take a two hour nap today but still feel tired.

Italian was brutal and went by in an instant. Instead of doing homework before class I finished the second Harry Potter book. I’m now reading the third one. I couldn’t tell you what we talked about at all today, except that one of my classmates broke his ankle but was still walking around on it because he didn’t want to miss his classes and his crutches and boot were in Hawaii. He was insane. I felt really bad for him. He acted tough throughout the entire class and then afterwords R and I were walking behind him and R started talking to him and he said it really hurt. The way he said it was REEAAALLY cute. I don’t know what it was but it was super adorable. And then R offered to carry him to his next class which was super funny. I would’ve offered but it would’ve been really awkward lol. Eventually we left him alone so he could limp to his class by himself.

The bus ride home was long, and made me think more about dropping out. Taking the bus wastes SOOO much of my time. and I can’t do anything on there because taking out my text books would take forever and I can’t always move around so much on the bus. I don’t want to go back to full time at the high school, because I can’t stand it, but my current schedule isn’t working. I don’t have enough energy/time/ motivation to get all my work done. UGGHHH.